Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Don't let your past dictate your future

So many of us fight the demons of our past everyday and it is hard.  I know that for me I have to constantly remind myself that it could have been me.  It could have been so much worse.  I thank God everyday for a new beginning.  Coming from a home where drugs and alcohol dictated what type of day we would have.  Having things stolen from me from my own family.  Being put into situations where I could have been molested or worse.  I look back on those things and all I can say is "but God."  My faith stems from going through and coming out of what could have been some tragic situations.  I have come a long way from the little girl looking out the window wondering if things would get better.  Now that I am older with a family of my own I strive to be what I wanted as a little girl, a good mother.  Not to say that my mother was a bad person but she had her battles and sometimes they got the best of her.  I used to wish that she was stronger than her addiction.  I used to hate waking up not knowing where she was or when she would return.  I had to grow up and be the big sister/mother to my siblings by making sure that they ate and got to school.  She would always return but each time she would return there would be a new emotional scar to deal with.  It was not like she abandoned us right?  She would just leave for days at a time not caring how we ate or if we were taken care of overtaken by her addiction.  She knew that we would be okay I guess.  But I have come a long way and so have my siblings.  Instead of falling victim to our circumstances we strive to be responsible adults and parents.  We work hard to break the cycle and the curse over our family.  My brother is an awesome father/husband.  My sister is working on be a great single mother and me, I am working on being the best woman I can be.  I want to inspire and encourage others to know that no matter what you're going through or have been through, you can always make your situation better.  Too many people hold on to the things they experienced in their childhood or the mistakes that they have made in the past and they let that dictate who they are today. 

Your past helps shape and mold you but it does not define who you are or who you can become.  Just because you fail or make mistakes does not change the fact that you can get up, dust yourself off and try again.  The difference is in how you get up.  Get up with fight and faith.  Know that you are not your past mistakes but a image of what overcoming and striving to be better looks like.  You can inspire others with your story.  Your story would not be what it is today with your history.  One of my favorite quotes is by Gandhi, "Be the change you want to see in the world." If you see it you can achieve it.  Hard work, dedication and learning to forgive is what it takes to get to the next level.  Forgive yourself, those who hurt you in the past or your parents.  Everybody goes through storms but it is how you weather that determines your strength.  Know that with God you can and will be GREAT. 

If you are reading this and you are struggling with accepting your past or forgiving those who hurt you, let it go.  Let go and let God.  You will never be who you are destined to be holding on to past grudges.  God forgives us even when we don't forgive ourselves.  Let go of the past and work on making your future your success story!

Monday, October 15, 2012

Faith walking

So lately I have been all over the place with my thoughts and my goals.  Being a wife and mother, my personal goals usually take a back burner to those of my family.  I want so much to be able to increase my territory and have a major platform to encourage and inspire others through my words and my wisdom.  I think that because I am a part of that "Right Now" generation, I am having a hard time sitting still and listening to the lord. 

So I have been in prayer and just constantly speaking with the Lord seeking guidance.  I said, "Lord I know what you have for me is for me and I just pray that you reveal it to me." Then I would google jobs for writers or organizations to help get jobs.  What I was not doing was writing or listening for Gods word.  I was so overwhelmed and frustrated that I was about to say forget it I will be ordinary.  But then a word came.  I was cleaning out my email and I always get these emails from a publication for EEW and I did not know what it was for.  I sign up for so much stuff that I did not know what it was so I went to the site to find out what it was.  It is a online christian publication, Empowering Everyday Women by Dianna Hobbs.  I read over the website and about the founder Ms. Hobbs.  Then I went to another site that she has called Getting Better Everyday and it had testimonies on there from women like me with struggles like me. through reading their testimonies I began to feel a sense of relief and revelation, whatever God has planned for my life will be revealed when he feels that I am ready.  I just need to focus on the gift that he gave me, writing.  I felt so uplifted and inspired and I know without a shadow of a doubt that I am destined to be extraordinary because God made me that way.  No matter the outcome the victory is already mine and I claim it. 

If you are not walking in faith then you are not living.  You have to know that God has a plan for you and your life.  You may not see through the storm but trust and believe that at the end of whatever you're going through or struggling with, God has a break through for you.  All you have to do and praise him through the storm and trust that he knows what's best.  I believe do you?

Be blessed and walk in faith knowing that God made you to be GREAT!

I found this book that I thought was appropriate for the post and a good read you can check it out at:

Thursday, September 13, 2012

Chasing dreams and raising kids

Some days I just want to give up the race and sit back like so many other people do.  But then I realize that God put me on this earth to be more, do more and inspire many.  My purpose is not to suck up resources but to help people reach their highest potential and contribute to the world.  On this journey of chasing my dreams it is hard.  I work a full time job, I have 4 children and a husband.  My consist of getting kids off to school, heading to work my 8+ hours a day, pick up kids, take kids to extra curricula activities, take kids home, cook, try to clean, check homework, make sure baths are had spend time with the hubby and try to squeeze in some writing time to pursue my career goals.  Just writing about it drains my energy. 

With all that is on my plate, I am still optimistic about what God has in store for me. I know that he did not put this deep desire in my soul for no reason at all.  Balancing all of my roles is sometimes hard and all the time a challenge but I am determined to make it work.  The way that I look at it is like this, what God has in store for me is for me and nothing/no one can take that away from me.  When it happens is when it is suppose to happen.  Keeping that in mind gives me the drive to keep pushing forward.  It gets hard everyday though I have no lie to tell.  I find myself having a difficult time focusing at work because my mind is on my career as a writer.  I find myself writing down writing topics, researching those topics and looking into ways to make my career dreams a reality.  I have always wanted to be able to inspire others through my own experiences and I have always wanted to one day have a talk show.  I guess that is why I get in trouble so much for talking at work so much! 

Do I have doubts?  Of course!  I think about all the things that are stacked up against me.  I have a family whom I love and cherish dearly, I am not a spring chicken anymore but I haven't reached the peak either so I am right in the middle of having to make this thing work.  When I start thinking about all of those things I just remind myself that it is not about where your at in life but where you going.  You can't see forward if you keep look back or down at right now.  I know without a shadow of a doubt that I will reach what my idea of success is I just have to define it first so that I can realize when I've reached it.

I hope that this helps to motivate someone else who maybe having some doubts or struggling with self.  The cliche` is true, you can be and do whatever it is that you set your mind to but you have to know when you've accomplished whatever that is!

Peace, love and success,
Writing Diva

Friday, September 7, 2012

The journey of life

Today myself and my family celebrated my Grandmama's 85th birthday.  It was so bittersweet.  I say that because to be able to live and see 85 years without suffering any cancers or serious illness is a blessing but it also holds so many memories of yesteryear and yesterday.  My Grandmother had seven kids, I say that because one of my aunties had gone home to glory as the old folks say.  She has 12 grandkids and too many great-grandkids and great-great-grandkids to mention.  She has watched and played a huge part in every single one of our growth and upbringing.  Throughout my 31 years on this earth she has fed me, clothe me, protected and provided for me and my sibling and cousins.  She has been the one constant thing in my life providing stability that I would not have known had it not been for her.  She has lived in the same house all of my life and has had the same home phone number.  Those are things that we don't get to see often today, nothing is constant anymore. I love my grandmother with every beat of my heart and I thank her for giving me the tools to be the woman that I am today.  She is the true epitome of what a grandmother/mother/matriarch should be.  She has never partied with us, we know she means business and we know without a shadow of doubt that she loves us.  She set the standard on how to be a woman.  She raised all 7 of her children on her own, helped them raise their children and continues to do for each and everyone of us, even our spouses.  Hold your love one near because tomorrow is a fantasy today and yesterday a memory.  You never know where you will end up or who you will have to depend on so treat everyone as you would like to be treated.

Be blessed and enlightened, learn something new each day and give someone hope each day.

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

It's 50/50 or kick rocks!

This is just me venting.  I HATE the way of thinking that some men have that they are exempt from what they like to call "womens work."  If you are not rich and your wife/significant other has to work to help to provider for the family/household then you need to step up and help around the house.  What makes you so special that you only have to do the bare minimum?  Most of these men these days only bring home the bare minimum anyways.  Women are starting to surpass men in the earnings division.  How you gone bring home little to no money and then request that we pick up after you and cook your food.  Hell they do that at?  In the words of Tamar Braxton, "get yo damn life boo!"  We have got to do better.  I be damned if I go work 8+ hours of work and then come home and be your suzy homemake and then you want to be a what in the sheets?  Yea okay, wait on it.  You better get your lazy bum up and wash those dishes.  I WILL NOT bring home the bacon, cook and clean up after you eat and sit your lazy ass down and watch a game.  Where the hell they do that at?  Drake has a Motto"YOLO" and so do I, 50/50 or kick Rocks buddy.

That is all....for now!

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Up late trying to figure out where to go from here

So I recently, like last week, graduated with a graduate degree in creative writing.  Since I can remember I have always loved reading, drawing and creating stories.  At times, stories were all I had to keep me sane.  I started out going to school for TV broadcasting because my ultimate goal was to be the next Oprah Winfrey right.  Well then life happened and I was blessed to have a son right after my first year in college and figured I needed something more practical so I got my BS in Business, blah blah.  Well I decided that if I went back to school, I was going back to pursue something I WANT to do so I took up Creative Writing for my Master's at Full Sail University.  Now I am sitting here in the middle of the night when I should be sleeping seeing as though I have a full-time job to go to in the AM.  and I am wondering, what the hell am I going to do now?  I know I want to write but how am I going to make a living at this? I do a little writing for an online publication, and I have been applying to freelance jobs.  I am looking at myself saying, you're crazy!  But in spite of all of the uncertainties, one thing I am certain of is that I am happy!  I am pursuing something I am passionate about and I am excited.  I pray to God or guidance because lord knows I am flighty!  I know that with faith and hard work, whatever God has in store for me will come to fruition.  I just have to be patient.  Patience is not a strong trait of mines so I know it is going to tough but I am a strong chick! I can't wait to see what tomorrow brings.